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Monday, May 30, 2011

A League of Their Own!

Nate with his Iron Pigs' Championship Trophy
Nate started playing baseball when he was 5-years-old.  He was just a little guy playing tee ball with our local YMCA.  The next year, we signed him up for "real" Little League and he began his baseball "career" with West U Little League.  Our first year was amazing.  We had an incredible coach who was that perfect combination of kind and gentle, yet firm enough to keep the dugout rebellions down.  To top it off he was also a great teacher of the game (he still is!)   Nate had a blast.  It's where he began playing catcher and he hasn't looked back since. 

The next year we had a terrible coach (and I won't name him here).  Needless to say that a grown man yelling and screaming at his own son like a lunatic and being a general jerk with a group of 7-year-olds, almost did the Quan Family in.  Nate was ready to give up the sport.  This guy was so bad that parents from other teams complained on behalf of our team to the Green Hats (the governing dudes, if you will).  It was so bad that this Mama Bear (currently writing this post) thought about taking a baseball bat to the man's head one day... but I figured that would be the opposite of what I wanted to be teaching Nate.  Dave was the more level-headed parent who had the talk with this guy, and it got a little better after that.  It was a truly disappointing experience - on many levels. 
The Iron Pigs and their coaches celebrate!
So, when Dave was asked to co-coach the next year with our friend, Mark, he said "yes."  This was more out of our desire to ensure that Nate didn't end up with a lunatic for a coach.  Now, Dave admittedly might have a few bad attributes... but being a lunatic, screaming and yelling... that for sure is NOT him.  That is me, at times, but it for sure is not him. :)  We also figured this was our only way of controlling who we had on our team - children and parents alike who were good sports with good hearts. 

Each year Nate grew in his skills, confidence and understanding of both the game and the teammates that made up each of our teams.  Some teammates are gems and Dave works hard to draft them again and again - our buddies Jacob and Jack, for instance.  We love them.  We love their families.  We love playing baseball with all of them.

And, each year there were some challenges.  But, Dave kept drafting on character first, skill set second.  And, each year we would end up with great kids we knew fit the bill... and a few times, you end up drafting someone you don't know... and you hope, hope, hope that they are going to be okay.  Since this is a public blog, I can't say much.  I'll just say, that we had a near perfect team one year but for one player - who also happened to be the most skilled player we had... however, the little man had a huge attitude problem.  And, as went him... well, so went the team.  And, since his parents attributed his bad attitude to the fact that he wasn't used to playing on a losing team... well you can imagine how disappointing that was for all of us - both for the boys and the other parents.


Coach and son relish their victory!
 Which brings us to THIS SEASON.  I won't get in to how it is that AAA (Triple A) is the most enjoyable year for many families.  There are a lot of reasons for that, and WULL would do good to ask us all why.  But, Dave marched into the drafting meeting with his little Excel spreadsheet and list and went after it.  Again - the criteria was good character first, skill level second.  He came home with our team list and we both smiled - what a great group of boys! The IRON PIGS were born!

Dave's Introduction at our first parents' meeting went something like this:

Dave:  "Hello, my name is David Quan and I will be your sons' baseball coach this year.  Now, if anyone in this room has been putting off saving for retirement or investing in your 401K because you are sure your kid is so good that his major league baseball career will pay for those things... well... you are on the wrong team.  Sorry."

Nate and some of his great teammates!
As he always does with both the parents and the boys, he emphasizes a few things:

-We're here to have fun
-We're here to learn and develop our skills better
-We're here to learn what it means to be a team
-We're here to encourage each other and lift each other up

So, the Iron Pigs set off on their adventure.  And they did all of these things... it was amazing to see these guys bond.  I've never seen anything like it.  They picked each other up when they were down, they encouraged each other on and off the field, they worked hard to develop their skills.. and they still lost.  Here we were - best kids and best parents ever... and it was a rough place we found ourselves in during playoffs.  We were 3rd out of 4 in our division... so I figured we'd be packing it in early this season.

And they lost their first playoff game... and had to go to the bottom in the Loser's Bracket. 

Then something happened.  Something clicked.  They didn't lose a game after that.  They won 6 games straight, all the way to the championship and were amazing!  Amazing defense... amazing batting... amazing hearts - always finding words of praise for each other.  And playing one game with 8 players and still winning!  We had had 9 when our star shortstop was injured.  2 others were out of town - one at a wedding and one at a sibling's college graduation.  Both emailed and texted the whole game to keep up-to-date!   And then we found ourselves up against the best team in the playoffs - hadn't lost a game.  And... we beat them twice to win it all!  Our little Iron Pigs fought their way out of the Loser's Bracket all the way to the championship game!


Nate and Baba... the whole team's grandmother! :)
 And the parents and even grandparents - what a blast we had!  We were loud and crazy and SO proud of our boys!  We got teary-eyed when we watched them take a knee outside the dugout when one of their teammates was injured on the field.  We got ecstatic when the bottom of our batting order was hitting just as amazing as the top of our order!  We pulled together because we wanted the same thing for our sons - an understanding that teamwork and the right heart, incredible sportsmanship - that's what was most important.

And this time... the kids with the greatest character and sportsmanship WON!  The celebration was huge, and one mom commented -- "Sometimes the nice guys do finish first!"  Amen to that!  However, we all agreed on this one fact:  Even if we had lost in the championship game... it was still the BEST SEASON EVER.  It was the best season ever even before the playoffs... merely to see our children pulling together and being a real team.

And, I can hear all the cynics (or in some cases those parents who nuttily push their children to win and blame everyone else when things don't go well)... "these kids still need ambition and drive in the real world."  I am sorry - but I disagree with that.  My child could grow up to be as rich as Bill Gates.  But, if he made it to the top by being a blamer, putting others down to advance himself, or by only caring about himself and his goals - well, then... I have totally failed as a parent.  It might sound "Pollyanna"ish - and for the cynics, you can have your success the way you think it ought to be gained.  But in this house, it is the depth of relationships that are the real success.  And here is where the Iron Pigs ultimately won - championship or not.

What an incredible adventure for our family.  It will be one of those great seasons that is life-forming for Nate.  He understood what this win meant - and that if he could replicate this in real life... this surrounding himself with others who have the right hearts, who support each other and lift each other up even when the going gets rough... well, he can go very, very far.

And, a reminder to Dave and I - and all of the parents on the team - that the values we instill in our sons - whether they win or lose - still make them winners at the end of the day.  A reminder that what we've been teaching them and hoping for them is actually coming to fruition in their lives.  I know it is all of our prayers that our boys will take this lesson with them into their futures.  So the Quans send a "shout out" to the Iron Pigs - Matthew, Nolan, Jacob, Cooper, Santi, Evan, Andy, Charlie, Scottie, Joseph and of course, Nate Quan - WAY TO GO!  We are so proud of you!

-Rachel for the Quan Clan

2 comments:

Bob Chin said...

It is a lesson that many of us have missed. Character development is based on values. It is lived out in community, in this case team.
I am proud of Dave as the coach, You as the mom, and Nate for his learning and example for others.
Love you!

Becky said...

Couldn't have said it any better. I have always had great parents on our son's teams; however, this year was truly special. Many thanks, and I look forward to one more celebration!